What have we become...

The other day, a friend of mine was looking at her phone with disgust and amazement. As I see her face and asked what she was watching, she turned her phone towards me to see a YouTube video of a live beheading. I was quick to think that it might have been fake because it was done with a knife and the man was too calm and not fighting for his life. Then I justified it by saying" well at least the first slice killed him almost instantly so the rest of it was just for the show." Then I thought..."My God, am I that desensitized that these are the thoughts I have?"

This lead me to really thinking about what our society had become. It appears as though technology and progress has reversed us and actually pushed us back on the evolutionary scale. More people are acting as animals. There is so much senseless violence and we have become indifferent to it.

Now before I get on my soapbox rant, please allow me to explain a little about myself, also as a sort of disclaimer.

I am a single mother with an intelligent, handsome 8 year old boy. I work roughly 70 hours a week most weeks and I'm so fortunate that my son's father and I agree very amicable...after all, isn't that how it should be?  It's in the best interest of our child. I am independent and have become accustomed to relying on only myself. I make a decent living and provide for my little boy.

I remember when I grew up. Most of our days were spent outside. We went and knocked on people's doors to talk to them...you know, face to face, a real conversation, not just through text. There was no bad language on basic cable. Anything that was considered controversial, sexy, or violent wasn't on until after bedtime. Most moms stayed home and raised the children while our fathers worked and provided for the family. Kids weren't so apt to suicide, violence, teen pregnancies, etc... We were riding bikes not checking out weapons of mass destruction online. We were playing man hunt around the neighborhood instead of watching acts of terrorism on YouTube. We cringed at blood and guts and gore and shrieked at the thought of a painful death.

It seems that we had it so much better than our children today. Today's society is a mess. We live where both parents work and leave latchkey children with no supervision and the internet as a babysitter and educator. Our teachers have to deal with out of control children that they cannot reprimand, but parents are using them to raise their kids and considering them inept and blame them for the values our children are lacking due to an inadequate home life. Divorce is not only accepted but has almost become the norm. The middle class cannot make ends meet causing stress, dysfunction, tearing families apart. It seems like the only way to get by is to be either very rich or poor.

I feel that we should take a long hard look at what we have become. If we could only go back in time to the way we were. It's time to bring back family values, morality, ethics and stop trying to keep up with the Jones's so that we can simplify and try to get back to a society based upon the old thinking of the male being the provider, as he instinctively is, and the female  being the caregiver, as she instinctively is. I'm not saying send the wifey back to the kitchen where she's barefoot and pregnant, but how about allowing mom and dad to be mom and dad and let us raise our children right. Let us not have such horrific sites so easily accessible. Let's put an end to the desensitization of our society in hopes that violent behavior will not be so easy for a person. Let's make our society less frustrated and keep the working class...every day America...able to make a decent life for their families. Happy people will lead to less violence and more morals. When you give someone nothing to lose, nothing matters, including other humans lives.

I fear for my son's future and have hopes that as long as I do my best to teach him well, that he may overcome the overwhelming odds that he will certainly face as he becomes a man.

Thank you.

FYI

Large Crowd Expected at Wednesday's Landfill, Rezoning Meeting
Wednesday night's Lower Saucon Township Council public hearing about whether to allow a land rezoning that would enable IESI Bethlehem Landfill to expand will likely be packed with supporters and opponents of the facility.

The agenda for Wednesday's special Lower Saucon Township Council public hearing about the proposed rezoning of land along Applebutter Road—which would allow IESI Bethlehem Landfill to expand westward if approved—has been released.
The meeting will begin at 7 p.m. in the Saucon Valley High School Audion room and a large crowd is likely, given that the issue of whether or not the rezoning should be allowed has been a contentious one among some local residents.

Council meetings are normally held at Lower Saucon Town Hall, but the hearing was scheduled to be held at the school due to the expectation of a significant turnout.

The township announced earlier that a number of rules will be in effect and security procedures will be in place to help ensure that the meeting runs smoothly.

The township planning commission has already voted in favor of the rezoning, while the township's environmental advisory council (EAC) and the Lehigh Valley Planning Commission have voted against recommending the rezoning.

At stake, among other things, are IESI's ability to operate its Lower Saucon Township facility for another decade or more, a number of jobs, and the millions of dollars in host fees and local taxes that the business currently generates.

Opponents of the landfill's expansion—many of whom live in the Steel City section of the township, near the landfill—have cited concerns over the impact a larger facility could have on the local environment and their quality of life in voicing opposition to the rezoning plan.

Supporters have argued that the township needs the revenue stream generated by its largest business to continue.

Both sides of have occasionally clashed at a number of township meetings held over the past 19 months, since IESI first announced its proposed western expansion.

Comments+ Leave a Comment

Save Lower Saucon September 25, 2013 at 07:08 AM
Residents of Lower Saucon. Please do not let Council approve this rezoning for the purpose of expansion of this landfill. They are importing most of their garbage, being paid a premium price, from NY and NJ. They have been pressuring the township hard, circulating propaganda, and bringing payrolled people to these meetings to speak up about how badly we need to let them expand. We do not need another 100 acres of landfill to look at in this community. Please attend this VERY IMPORTANT HEARING and speak up for what is RIGHT for us and for our future generations here. It is vital that we all speak up to stop this from going any further. Thank you!! BTW - many, many of us who are opposed to the expansion do not live in Steel City. This is not only an issue for Steel City (who will feel most of the pain), but for all of here in this township.

Where The Ruffalo Roam: The Setting

        Now that I've gave you a little insight and back round on my wonderful family, let me set the setting where most of he stories will take place. As I said before we moved down to North Carolina when I was ten years old, the town that we moved into only had around ten thousand people in it. The town that I came from in New York only had around three thousand people. As I got to know more people in that small town in North Carolina, I noticed that so many people complained about living in such a small town with nothing to do, but they didn't know what small really was. The town that I lived in New York had at tops three traffic lights, and there was nothing ever going on there. So in the little town in North Carolina, I listened to all the complaints, but if you really wanted something to do there was always something to do. I'm not going to lie, there was  many times that I was bored out of my mind, but I always knew there was something to do, I just chose not to do it. One of the things that people loved to do is go to high school sporting events, no matter their age, they didn't have to have a connection to the team at all. On Friday night everyone came out to the football field to watch, the team loose. The team wasn't very good. I'm telling you though, on Friday nights when the lights came on people from all walks of life migrated to that football field. There were the clean cut people that thought they ran the town, the average Joes', the parents, and the people who looked like they haven't came out of the woods for thirty years. Friday night football brought the whole town together as it does in many small southern communities, it was fun to go out every once in a while to see what all was going on in the town. The town it self was beautiful though, it was very well kept up, the streets were clean, the buildings were graffiti-less, the people were great and everything just had a nice clean feel to it. The people in the south are much different then the people in the north, they're a lot more hospitable, everyone is in each others business, everyone knew each other. It was almost as though everyone were friends. Every one you looked at you could expect a nice big smile, and a wave. Lots of the elderly spent their time just sitting out on their front porch waving at and greeting the people that came by. It was nice knowing that there was always someone watching out incase something happened. Many of those elderly people had been in that small town all their lives and couldn't ever see themselves getting out of there. There were a couple people that I knew, whose family had been in that small town for generations. I'm not lying when I tell you that everyone knew each other in that small town, if something happened, everyone knew and were at your doorstep asking if there were anything that they could do. Especially if you jut so happen to have just had a baby, you don't have to cook for a couple months because everyone from the town brings you at least one meal, so your set for a month or so. It really is a wonderful place. With that being said I must go, so goodbye for now!!

      - William Ruffalo

Are Your Emotions Getting in the Way of Your Success

It's your life...Own it.

TODAY IS THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 19, 2013  |  TIME TO learn FROM THE EXPERTS

6 Ways Your Emotions Can Sabotage Your Financial Success
by Jocelyn Black Hodes, DailyWorth's Resident Financial Advisor

We are often our own worst enemies, especially when it comes to money and what to do with it. As a financial advisor, I’ve found that the biggest obstacle to my clients’ financial success was not market performance, my pick of investments or a lack of income on their part, but rather their emotions. Whether it was unhappiness, guilt, fear, shame or greed, there were plenty of feelings that fueled negative behaviors and made my job extremely challenging. And while these same emotions likely lead them to consult me for guidance in the first place, ironically, they are also what often held them back from being guided.

We grow up with experiences and role models that shape how we view and feel about the world around us, and these experiences almost always dictate our decisions and behaviors. My clients and I regularly struggled to help them overcome their stubborn emotional urges. Chances are, you are struggling too. To help, I’ve highlighted the most problematic behaviors, the emotions behind them and how to get out of your own way to achieve your financial goal

The Procrastinator

We all procrastinate. Especially when it comes to things we don’t like or understand. Financial planning is commonly one of those things. Most of my clients were long overdue in meeting with a financial advisor by the time they got to me, but then they continued to procrastinate after our work began. I found it nearly impossible to get some clients to fill out and return required paperwork on their own, send in money or get information I requested. 

As frustrating as it was, I learned that this seemingly lazy behavior was really the byproduct of their subconscious fear of having to be financially responsible and, in a way, grow up. Problem is that the longer you wait to take control of your financial future, the more insecure it will be. 

The solution: To help make the planning process easier and quicker, I would make paperwork and other info gathering steps a joint effort with my clients. I would also check in regularly and give them deadlines to help keep them accountable and on track. If you are guilty of procrastinating with your financial planning, set deadlines for yourself, get a family member or friend involved (if you don’t have an advisor) and set dates with them to check in with you on a regular basis to help keep you accountable.

The Overspender

Most of us overspend every now and then, if not regularly. Why? Because we are trying to feel better about ourselves or fill an emotional void (usually unsuccessfully). I had a client who spoiled his child because he grew up poor and didn’t want his son to. I had another client who spent way too much on a lavish lifestyle to make up for her insecurity surrounding being perpetually single. 

The solution: Splurging on occasion is OK, but living beyond your means is not and makes any successful financial planning nearly impossible. As I instructed my clients, first and foremost, you must stop using credit cards. Physically remove them from your wallet and hide them to avoid temptation. In addition, gaining clarity and creating structure around your future goals by going through a financial planning process should help you stay focused on what’s most important and avoid unnecessary overspending.

The Liar

Even if you haven’t lied to your doctor, you’ve probably lied to your financial advisor, or would if you had one. Most of us fudge the truth from time to time and some of us more frequently. Strangely enough, we are much more likely to be forthcoming with our health problems than with our financial problems. Shame or embarrassment are the common culprits. 

The solution: When a client would lie about their finances -- whether it was overstating their savings, understating spending or denying debt -- it would render my calculations inaccurate and my recommendations potentially unsuitable and unrealistic. If you lie to a doctor, your chances of being properly diagnosed and treated are all the more compromised. Similarly, lying to your financial advisor (or yourself) will throw your entire financial plan off track and make the odds of achieving your goals slim to none. Understand that your path towards good financial health starts with being honest about your bad habits.

The Know-It-All

One of the main reasons people (should) hire financial professionals is to gain objective, expert, personalized guidance. Yet many clients have a bad habit of acting like the expert and trying to reverse roles with their advisors. As an advisor, it was extremely challenging and frustrating to help someone who didn’t seem to want to be helped and distrusted everything I said. It’s one thing to be cautious and question advice; it’s another thing to be overly cynical, emotional and argumentative, which can easily lead to progress paralysis or irrational decision-making. I once had to ask a client: what is the point of us working together? 

The solution: If you think you are well-educated in matters of finance and investing, that’s great--hopefully you are leveraging that knowledge to your financial advantage, either on your own or through an equitable partnership with a professional. But if you are going to bother paying for advice, you should only do so if you trust that person enough to follow it. 

The Worrier

Many people are wary of the financial industry and with good reason. Investing is risky enough without the added risk of greedy crooks at the top pulling strings. The problem is that the stock market is one of the only places available to grow our money enough over the long term to outpace inflation and support our income needs later in life. 

The solution: Every day that a fearful client would stall on investing her money meant wasting precious time to achieve her goals. In these situations, I would suggest that the client start small, slow and simple, investing a relatively minimal amount of money initially in a broadly diversified, passive index fund and setting up an automatic monthly investment plan to gradually add to her account. Then I would check in with the client every quarter to review her progress and gauge her comfort level, making minor adjustments if necessary. 

Worrying too much about losing money or making the wrong decision can lead to investment paralysis, which means losing money anyway (due to inflation). The investments you choose matter less than the time you spend invested. Just get started.

The Chaser

When the market or a certain fund or stock is hot, the average investor tends to chase it. In many cases, they buy in too late, only to see it sharply decline in value soon after. Take Apple stock, for example. After witnessing Apple explode last year, many eager, short-sighted investors jumped in, just in time for the 30-percent decline over the past year. Unfortunately for them, Apple stock is now considered a relative “bargain” by many industry experts (if you can afford to spend over $400 per share).

The solution: Financial advisors frequently have to combat and temper some clients’ emotionally charged lust to buy the latest trendy investment. In most cases, it is for their own good, though they usually don’t believe that at the time. Do yourself a favor (and your advisor if you have one) and focus more on your long-term growth goals, rather than quick gains (which really could end up being quick losses). Also, don’t pick investments simply based on recent performance; instead, carefully consider their longer-term histories and how well (or not) they fit into your overall portfolio. 

Where the Ruffalo roam: The Beginning.

Hello, my name is William Ruffalo, an I am going to tell you the story of my life. The life of the oldest child of a family with five children. This story isn't all about me though, its about all the great times that our family has had, the good times, the bad times, the crazy times, and the breath taking times. As you could imagine a family with five children is a pretty busy family, and many times it can be over whelming. At the same time though it is very rewarding and can teach you a multitude of things. So lets get some back round information. As you know my name is William, in 1995 I was born in the town of Monroe, New York. I am the child of my loving parents, Tom and Sherri Ruffalo. I have two younger brothers that were also born in New York, Joseph and Christopher. Now at the age of ten I moved down to the great state of North Carolina, that's where my two wonderful sisters were born, Mary Elizabeth and Caroline Elise. The events that I am going to share with you in this series are all true, every single story that I tell will be one hundred percent true. However they will not be in chronological order, I am going to tell them as they come to me. As I said before, I am the oldest, and being the oldest of five children comes with its ups and downs. Being the oldest I have way more responsibilities than my siblings do, but one of the best things about being in a large family is that as the other children get older all the chores get split between all of us. So as my brothers got older I no longer was the one that my parents called when something needed to be done like, taking the trash out, helping clean the house, taking the dogs out, and numerous other things. With that being said though, there is the beautiful little sisters that I have, the princess'. They don't have to lift a finger, none of us will let them. Having three older brothers that love them more than anything is going to be tough for them though, as they reach the age where boys are going to want to take them out. No one is ever going to be good enough for my little princess' but seeing as I live 600 miles away from them now my brothers will have to take care of that for me, and I know they can and will. My family is everything to me, there isn't anything in this world that I wouldn't do for my family. Some children tend to distance them selves from their family and never get close to them, but for me family is all I need. I have many friends, but all friends come and go, the only constant is family. All throughout my life I've never really went to hangout with friends too much, id much rather sit at the house in the living room watching t.v. with my family, work on a car with my dad, take my brothers to the ball field, take my mother out to a movie, or sit down and draw with my little sister. when it comes down to it who do you really have? Your family. With that being said I conclude the beginning to my story, our story. The story of a family.


                        -William Ruffalo

The beginning

The time is here! Every where you go the color of the leaves are changing, the temperature is dropping, and the smell of a fire is always in the air. The beginning of fall is here. The days are getting shorter and the nights are getting colder. You can smell the fire places as they burn to keep the families warm. Before we know it Halloween will be here and after that Thanksgiving and Christmas. I sit back and wonder, what happened to the summer? Where did it go? So I think of all the great things that I did this summer, I played my last season of baseball, I made new friends, I went to the beach, and I moved. This summer was actually really eventful, it was one of the best yet. Its time to say good bye though, good bye to all the long summer nights fishing and sitting at the baseball field. It's time to welcome the nice cool fall, time to get all of the winter coats out that were put away for the summer. Now its time to get all bundled up and go sit be the fire and tell the stories of the great things you did this summer. Football season has started, and the baseball season is coming to an end, but were not going to talk about that because my favorite baseball team isn't doing good, and my favorite football team has started with two loses. To me fall is the best season of all, the temperature is perfect, the smell in the air is great, and the colors surrounding everything are so beautiful. I love the beautiful colors of the fall, the shades of brown and oranges of the leaves that start to accumulate on the ground. It all is so beautiful, its almost overwhelming. I'm very artsy and one of my favorite things to do is paint, and my favorite time of year to paint is the fall because everything is so beautiful, the waters are nice and dark, the trees are bare, and there is a wonderful color of the leaves on the ground. The fall just has a magnificent feel to it, its not too cold, it's almost electrifying. Now that the summers gone its kind of hard to go out and get on the jet ski or boat, but just think of all the fun stuff that you can do in the fall and winter. You can, start making decorations for Halloween and thanksgiving, you can carve pumpkins, and go on haunted excursions. As it starts to get colder and starts to snow there's even more great things that can be done, for instance, you can go to skiing, snowboarding, you can jump on a snowmobile, get some friends together and go ice skating, sit with your loved ones by the fire, and all the other great  thing that you can think of. So even though the summer is gone, all is not lost, there still is plenty of fun to be had. You just have to go out there and make it happen. I advise you to be extremely careful though because the winter can be brutal, the roads get icy, the nights get cold, and everything gets slippery real fast. So get your bags of rock salt, and the chains for your tires and be ready for the cold days to come, because whether you like it or not they're coming and nothings going to stop them!

I wouldnt have it any other way

So anyone who has lived  in a small town knows how it is in a small town. Everyone knows each others business, and everyone knows the "big names" in the town. In a small town your reputation starts when you are young, and it depends on what your last name is. Well you see I moved into that small town when I was ten, and I didn't have the right last name. Essentially, I was no one. So when I started playing baseball in that small town, I didn't get to play much. I wasn't a bad player by any means, granted I wasn't a super star either but I was better than some of the kids out there on the field. So, it was the same story all up into middle school. My seventh grade year I didn't even bother trying out for the team because I had almost given up on the whole baseball scene in that town. However my eighth grade year I was convinced to try out for the team and to my surprise I made the team, but again I thought it would be like all the other seasons I had played in that town. Again to my surprise, the coach was all about winning and he put whoever he thought was going to win out on the field, and guess what? I played! Still to this day I admire that man, because he had the guts to play who he wanted, he didn't care who he made mad. That year my faith was restored, so come the next year I tried out for the high school team, and I didn't make the cut, so as you could imagine I was devastated. It tore me to pieces that I didn't make the team, yet people that weren't as good as me made the team and I didn't. I questioned my self a lot that year, I didn't think that I was ever going to play baseball again, and it hurt, it hurt worst than anything. So come the next year when it came about that time for baseball to start up I was still upset and had many doubts, but my father always told me that quitting wasn't an option. So I tried out for that team again, and when it came time for cuts my stomach was tore up. This year it was different though, instead of the coach calling everyone into a separate room to tell you if you made the team, he posted a piece of paper on the wall with the people who had made the team. So as I walked down the hall to the coach's office where the paper was posted on his door. I couldn't breathe, I was so nervous I just knew that I didn't make the team. I eventually made my way down the hall, and too the paper, I started from the top reading down the list and I saw all the names of the people I knew would be there, and at the very bottom of the list, there was my name! I had made the team! I'm not going to lie I didn't expect it to be there, I had to read the list again to make sure I wasn't lying to myself and again my name was at the bottom of the list! My hard work had paid off I was on the team, so I worked hard, every hard to make sure that I played when it was game time. I worked the hardest no a single person on that team worked harder than me, but when it came game time I didn't play. I didn't understand this, isn't hard work supposed to pay off? I was dumbfounded, I couldn't understand. I even practiced with the starters, yet come game time I was on the bench. So I had a plan, that summer I went to the next town over and played American legion baseball. For those of you that don't know, American legion baseball is for baseball players who wanted to play more into the summer. Only the better players from the  high schools got the chance to play on those teams and I made it. Not only did I make the team, I played I was a pitcher and I closed every game, I got to play every game that season. So the next year come high school I had made the team the year before which means I was automatically on the team I didn't have o try out again, but still I didn't get to play. That summer though I couldn't go to the other town and play legion ball, but I made the team in this town, but I didn't get to play. The next year was the same story, I was on both teams but I didn't get to play, that was my senior year and I didn't even play. That was the last year that I was eligible to play baseball, it was gone, the sport that I had spent so many years practicing and the last year that I could play I was confined to the bench. So I began to resent the coaches that had done this to me, I was so mad, not only at them, but at my self. I was mad at myself because I had let this happen to me, I felt like I had wasted all that time. Those couple weeks were terrible I couldn't sleep at night, it was eating me up that I had spend all that time practicing just to sit the bench. So a couple weeks after my final season of baseball it was time for me to leave that small town, but before I left I went back to the baseball field where I spent most of my afternoons and weekends, practicing and sitting the bench. So I sat there on that bench for one last time, and I watched the sun set on that beautiful field, and a tear ran down my left cheek. I'll never forget that moment, that was the moment that I realized that all the time I spend on that field was not wasted. I sat on that bench and cried like a little girl, I remembered all the good times that I had on that field, all the friends I made and all that great moments that I wouldn't have had without that field. As I sat there all the hate that I had for those coaches, it all turned into love. I no longer hated them because I knew then that I wouldn't be the man that I am today without those coaches. They say that you'll miss it when its gone, and I do I miss it more than anything. So as I sat there and wiped away my tears, I realized that even though I didn't get to play much, I wouldn't have had it any other way. Later that night when I got home, I thanked my parents for making me stay with it, because without them I would have quit a long time before that. It's funny though, now I live over 600 miles away from that baseball field yet every single night I think of that baseball field. I miss it more than anything, I think of it every second of everyday, and I wouldn't have it any other way.


       - William Ruffalo

The end

Summer is coming to an end! Football season is starting, baseball season is ending the final days of summer are here! So go out and soak up as much sun as possible before its too late!